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The gift of celibacy

To be celibate is not simply "not to have human love" but to have one's heart available to live only for God and, through him, for others.

Alejandro Vázquez-Dodero-June 6, 2023-Reading time: 4 minutes
celibacy

Being celibate is not the same as being single or not sharing one's life with another person. Celibacy is a gift from God, a gift by which one's heart is given to God completely, without human mediation. And this is true for lay people as well as for consecrated persons or priests.

What is celibacy?

Above all, we are speaking of a gift - a gift - from God, through which he calls for the love of an undivided heart, without the mediation of any earthly love. It is a call to cooperate in a special way in the transmission of supernatural life to others.

Whoever receives this call exercises the common priesthood - in the case of the laity - or the common and ministerial priesthood - in the case of consecrated ministers. Therefore, this gift generates a profound spiritual paternity or maternity in the celibate, who, in some way, gives himself or consecrates himself to the whole world.

This gift, as we can see, is granted by God to lay people as well as to religious or priests, although with a specific meaning in each case.

Are there different ways of living celibacy in the Catholic Church?

Lay people who receive the celibacy are united to Christ "in exclusivity" and, from the place in which they live, without separating themselves from the world, they correspond to this gift.

Equal to their equals, as their equals, with or without external distinction, but without this distinction from others being something inherent to their celibate condition.

In the case of religious, celibacy is at the service of their specific mission, which is to give witness that the end of the Christian is the Kingdom of Heaven. They do this by living a state of consecrated life through the vows of poverty, chastity and obedience, with a life of dedication to God and help to others. This entails a certain detachment from professional, family and social realities.

Although religious can develop some of these realities - for example, in the field of education or assistance - their mission is not to sanctify the world from within them - that is the case of the laity - but from their religious consecration.

Thus, celibacy does not separate from other men, but is consecrated to them. And it separates or not from the earthly world, as we have seen, depending on whether the celibate is a religious -apart from it- or a lay person -not apart from it-. Non-religious priests, for the purposes that concern us, would likewise live their celibacy in the midst of the world.

It should be noted that we are not talking about bachelorhood, since there are those who, even belonging to a faith, do not marry, but do not do so for the reasons mentioned above, but for other, also noble, reasons, such as caring for their parents, dedicating themselves to social tasks, etc., which does not keep them away from the world.

What does embracing celibacy or "being celibate" entail?

To be celibate is not to be available in the sense that, since there is no human commitment or love, one has quantitatively more time and possibilities to carry out apostolic works or the universal Church itself.

It is rather an attitude: to have the heart available to live only for God and, through him, for others.

And it turns out that those who live in the celibacy attains a full and fruitful life, without losing anything of what is human. He enjoys a rich affectivity, because the surrender to God in celibacy not only does not deprive, but increases the capacity for human love.

The celibate, by the fact of being celibate, should not sacrifice or surrender his affective potential. The only thing he does is to direct that affectivity in accordance with the gift received, and if it implies surrendering displays of it - such as the sexuality that is exercised in the marital sphere - he will do so willingly, and out of love of correspondence. It would be a reductionism to consider that the person needs to complete his affectivity with the other sex to reach the fullness of love.

One is complete as such. While it is true that we need God and others - we are contingent, we need each other - to achieve happiness. And for the affective relationship to be complete, it does not have to be sexual.

He who receives the gift of celibacy allows himself to be loved entirely by God, and by this gift he can give to others the love he receives. He seeks to fill the world with divine love, but to the extent that it corresponds, giving himself exclusively to the Lord. And the same is done by those who receive the gift - also a gift - of marriage, but in this case they will do so through conjugal and family relationships, since affectivity will depend on the love between a man and a woman open to the family.

Should we always speak of "apostolic" celibacy, even when referring to "priestly" or "consecrated" celibacy?

The gift of celibacy is always apostolic, in any case. What happens is that this apostolicity will be translated in different ways, according to the mission of each one, whether lay, religious or priest.

Without this "apostolic" note, celibacy would lose its meaning.

The laity will exercise their apostolate by sanctifying the world from within their lives as professionals, family members and in the social environments in which they operate.

Religious, to whom "consecrated" celibacy is assigned, also incorporate in their gift the apostolic dimension. And priests, from "priestly" celibacy.

Finally, although it may seem obvious, it should be emphasized that any Catholic, whether or not he receives the gift of celibacy, is called to this apostolate, which is nothing more than transmitting the love of God - which reaches all his children - through the example of his life and his word. Just as we are all called to holiness, and not only those who by divine grace receive the gift of celibacy.  

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