Arthur Alderliesten, director of the foundation Schreeuw om Level (Cry for life), in the Netherlands, has intervened in the XVII National Pro-Life Congress with a presentation on the role of the male partners of women who consider terminating the life of the unborn child. In this sense, his objective is to prevent these men from being inhibited when an unwanted pregnancy appears and in the abortion process, since 31 % of them remain neutral if their partner becomes pregnant and wishes to have an abortion.
Faced with such a pregnancy, 42 % of male partners urge or suggest that the woman have an abortion, and 27% suggest that she not do so. But 31 % are silent. "These are the ones we would like to reach," he assures. He and his people are convinced of the impact that men's attitudes can have in saving the life of the unbornand for the woman to continue with the pregnancy.
This is what he defended at the XVII Pro-Life Congress that, under the slogan 'From the entrails', was held in Madrid, organized by the Federation Spanish Association of Pro-Life Associations, presided by Alicia Latorre, with the collaboration of the CEU and the Catholic Association of Propagandists (ACdP), chaired by Alfonso Bullón de Mendoza. Arthur Alderliesten attended Omnes in the middle of the congress.
What is the current regulation of abortion in the Netherlands?
- The Netherlands is one of two countries in Europe where abortion is available up to 24 weeks. The other is the United Kingdom. In Belgium they are trying to extend the time limit from 12 to 18 weeks.
When the Dutch law was made in 1984, the limit of viability was 24 weeks. And that's why that limit was chosen. But that was in 1984. Today, thanks to medical developments, it is possible for a 21-week child to come through. But now it's not on the political agenda in the Netherlands and it's not debated.
In recent years, the trend has been to have 30,000 abortions a year. But lately there has been an important upturn, and now there are about 40,000 a year. And we don't know exactly why.
Are there any intellectuals, any cultural environment, apart from your foundation, that defend the right to life from conception in the Netherlands?
- About ten associations defend this right, along with ours. A few months ago we had a guest speaker, an American, who came from the United States, and she had a very negative view of the Netherlands: there are hardly any pro-lifers here. However, there are more than nine thousand people, almost ten thousand, in the pro-life environment. This changed her perception of the Dutch society.
You coordinate the Ethics project at the Prof. Dr. G.A. Lindeboom Institute, what is the focus of your research now?
– One of the issues I'm researching at the moment is human dignity, and how to use the narrative, a discourse on dignity that is positive in the European Parliament. Because currently the pro-life factions and prochoiceThey do not speak to each other, they do not understand each other. The objective would be to unite, to look for meeting points thanks to this discourse.
What is the main message of your speech at this congress?
- Building good relationships between men and women will save lives. Through the commitment of the male, the commitment of the man. I want to, I have a specific message for the Church. And that is that they must prepare young men to be fathers.
Actually, the problem is not that men do not assume their responsibility, because I have found many who say: well, I made a mistake, I had sex and now there is the problem of a child, I assume my responsibility by paying for an abortion. So, the problem is not that they don't take responsibility, but that they are not prepared to be parents. It is a matter of them assuming their responsibility as parents. It is the mission of the Church, of all Christian denominations, to form them and prepare them to be parents.
What are the objectives of your foundation??
- With a hopeful approach, we strive for a society in which abortion is unthinkable, and we would like to prevent the death, the murder, of unborn children.
We do this in two ways. By offering psychological support to pregnant mothers, and also after the abortion.
What about the role of men in unwanted pregnancies?
- We offer specific support for men in women's pregnancies. Our experience has been very positive when we have approached the Dutch media. They have given media coverage to the cause we advocate, which is to involve men in the abortion process, and to recognize that it impacts them as well. The marginalization of men's role in the decision about life and abortion is what we have come to fight.
There is a widespread view that men have no interest in abortion. Only in sexual relations, and then they disappear from the equation. But this is not the case.
Explain, if you would be so kind.
- When we approach and listen to men in this abortion decision-making process, we find at least six different situations.
The first is that they did not know about the pregnancy, and perhaps not even about the abortion, which the couple did not inform her about.
The second, knew about the pregnancy, but prefer to hide their feelings and convictions, not wanting to say anything to the woman.
Third, she pressures him to abort.
The fourth, she supports him in his decision to have an abortion.
Fifth, she opposes abortion, although she does not say so openly.
And the last one, it abandons the woman physically and emotionally, by rejecting any kind of responsibility for her and her decisions.
In reality, many men do want to take responsibility, but struggle to find the right way to disagree.
In his presentation he offered some percentages on the influence of men on their partners.
- Yes. In a 2021 study, you can see men's attitude toward abortion, and the influence it may ultimately have on abortion. Here is the outline:
The man's influence on his partner:
1.- I strongly urged her to have an abortion (12 %). I suggested that she have an abortion (30 %).
Total, abortion yes (42 %)
2.- I did not give any advice, I was neutral (31%)
3.- I suggested that she not have an abortion (19%). I strongly advised her not to abort (8%).
Total, no abortion (27 %).
(Lifeway Research: Care net Study of Men whose Partner has had an Abortion, 2021 - n=983)
What stands out from this data?
- The section I would like to highlight is that of men who remained neutral and did not give any advice to the woman, 31 %.
It is precisely that segment of 31 % that we would like to reach, because we realize the impact that the man's attitude can have in saving the life of the unborn, and in convincing the woman to continue with the pregnancy. Many times, the man is not even able to provide good advice.
They do not feel ready to be parents
So much for the conversation with Arthur Alderliesten. The director of 'Schreeuw om Level' also presented some reasons men give their partners for having an abortion. The first or second of them is that they don't feel ready to be fathers. "I have four children myself," Alderliesten revealed, "and I assure you that I still don't feel ready for it," he said in his presentation.
